on rotation

3 hrs of sleep last night (thanks to a crazy school and poor time management), a crummy day full of stress (running down 8 streets and 2 avenues in the span of 10 mins to buy 2 rolls of specialized film is not something one should do when they have already reached zombified state), missed office hours (even though i knocked 4x on federico's door and called once, he was never around during my breaks within his 9-5 office hour day...go figure), interactions from incompetent people who work within school (payroll and student employment) and at the world famous photo lab, duggal, which ironically produces crappy prints and overcharges for regular 4x6 single copies...argh...still annoyed, and spilling half of my pear sizzle martini on brian's pants, amounted to 1.5 drinks of pear sizzle down into my near-empty stomach (don't think a homemade ramen with nothing but soup mix and a peach cobbler count for much) and a spinning head. perhaps some sleep will help my spinning head and bring about a better day tomorrow. just maybe...

p.s. did i mention that water bottles were thrown at brian, ali, and i while walking back towards the hotel? the nerve!!! if i weren't in my spinning state, i would have ran after that gang to give them a piece of my mind...though on second thought, that might not have been such a great idea...

one more

another late night to add to the growing pile since the semester started. at least it's not 4AM yet, but still late enough that my body feels like it's gonna shut down on me at any given moment. oh school...how you love to steal my sleep, my meal time, and often try to steal my sanity. 3 more days til the weekend. let the countdown begin.

what they don't tell you on the course calendar

i can't believe i've just spent the last 2 hours designing a template for a box. many sketches, cuts, test models, and precise measurements later, and voila. ah, the life of an art student. makes me wonder what shape my bones and body will be like in 10 years. all the craning over my desk, staring at the computer screen till my eyes can barely stay open, sitting till my butt is completely numb, trimming prints till my arms are sore...it's bound to do a number on your health, if not sanity. in any case, i'm gonna call it a night. it's been another long day at school and i'm mentally and physically wiped out from all the work from this week. thankfully 2 out of 3 big projects are done and out of the way. just 1 more biggie tomorrow and then i'll be weekend-bound! can't wait for saturday, cupcakes, and a movie. it's been way too long...

p.s. a super happy birthday to my baby sister who's not such a baby anymore ;)

miso love soup!

after another long day of work, school, and a lecture by mr. abbott miller at SVA, i arrived back at my apartment to discover a rather large envelope with my name on it! seeing as i usually only receive junk mail, bills, and the occasional magazine (i can't wait for my communication arts annuals to start arriving), it was quite exhilarating to find something new. and who doesn't like surprises in big packages? exactly.

so after unloading all the bags i was carrying (by the time i made it through my front door i had 5...my backpack, SLR bag, purse, frozen dinner and OJ from duane reade, and a bag of ziploc containers from home depot...clearly i travel hobo style), i tore open the envelope to discover a sweet, encouraging letter and 2 big bags full of instant tofu miso soup to cheer me up from my uber crappy week last week.

many thanks to naomi, another angel from back home, for mailing me some yummies! i had forgotten how much i love miso soup (it's definitely been a couple months). i had a cup of soup tonight and look forward to all the other soup nights to come. though i'm still exhausted from all the homework and late nights, it definitely helps to know that there are people rooting for you and caring about you. and it is their encouragement and friendship that often helps me get through all the chaos and craziness that is my life.

paula

today i got to hear graphic design giant, paula scher, lecture at FIT. i am quite a fan of her work (my faves include the shake shack identity, symphony space and bloomberg headquarters signage and wayfinding, and of course, her poster work for the public theater...gotta love that bauhaus flavor), so it was so wonderful to hear her speak about her life and career from backwards to forward. wish i had pictures, but like the scatterbrain i've been lately, i of course left my camera at home today. bah.

and now, off to bed. i overslept by over an hour this morning and woke up at 10:34AM, 4 mins. after i was already supposed to have been at work. talk about getting a bad start to the week. hopefully 2 alarms will have me up in time tomorrow.

on a side note, it's sad when you think that 1:39AM is "early"...

these days

these days i work till my eyes burn and can barely stay open, my back and neck tire from sitting in a chair confined to my desk and computer, and the clock strikes 4:30AM. it's hard to stay motivated when all you want to do is sleep, but something deep inside tells me that if i want to succeed in the big world of graphic design, i have to pay my dues in my share of late nights.

tomorrow will mark the start of week 6 and this week is gonna be a killer. 3 major projects due, 2 guest lectures by paula scher and abbott miller, work, class, and other smaller projects almost guarantee late nights every day of this week. just hope my body is up for the challenge and all the germs stay away from me.

plan b

after completing week 5 of this semester, i can safely say that all the staying up late, stressing over school/work/life, and constantly getting/feeling sick (the 1.5 month-long cough has finally subsided and my nasal passages have been in the clear for the last 2 hrs...ahhh the small victories in life), has not worked out so well for me. and so now, onto plan b...

adam, my brilliant packaging design teacher for the semester, suggested a different way of working, and the test run ran tonight. in working in 20 mins intervals per class, i was able to maximize on my productivity while minimizing on burning out in that subject and keeping my momentum going. 2 hrs later, i'm halfway through my advertising design homework, got a good chunk done for my packaging design project, and have taken some big bites out of my graphic design homework, though there is still much more to go for that class (trying not to get overwhelmed, but that class has supersized homework loads). it also helped to have a friend along for the ride. thanks to nina, timer extraordinaire, and homework buddy for the night!

so now some shut eye before another packed day tomorrow. it's gonna be a tough year, but i'm a fighter.

angels + miracles

after a rough and exhausting couple of days (with one more day to go til the weekend), i left my apartment early this morning feeling downhearted and unprepared to face another day of catastrophe (as many of my days have been recently). instead, i experienced a mini miracle, much understanding, and angels who truly made my day...

after missing work yesterday due to my failing immune system, my boss greeted me with complete understanding and concern that i was getting enough rest and eating well (both of which i haven't been able to do much of recently, but i'm doing my best to change that). then i explained how the recent mortality of my usb key had wiped out major projects, one of which was due today. without hesitation, he gave me permission to step out of the office and seek some IT help. though claudio wasn't able to help me with my drive, he referred me to roberto, who miraculously was able to pull all contents off of my drive onto his desktop before the usb key died once more. tidal waves of relief washed over me.

then, my typography 3 class and a half-done project to hand in, due to my usb troubles. my prof was super understanding about it all, her and my classmates offered a helpful critique, and i felt as though a huge weight had been lifted off of my shoulders.

then to cap off the day, i received an unexpected e-mail from tony that reminded me how lucky i am to have such amazing friends that look out for me, especially in times of great disappointment and frustration. his thoughtfulness and kind gesture to help out was so moving and i couldn't help but feel so blessed. thank you!

forget the umbrella..how 'bout relocation?

so the bad luck storm i was enduring before has officially escalated to hurricane status.

just when i thought things couldn't possibly get worse (silly me...), my 4.0 GB USB drive decided to die today.

yes, it could have been worse and this could have happened at the end of the semester, just as it already has twice before (apparently some kind of data saving apparatus needs to die on me at least once a semester while i'm at pratt), but i'm still somewhat annoyed and frustrated since i lost about 3 weeks worth of projects. augh. technology, why do you hate me so much??? seriously.

why is it not friday already?

it's only wednesday night, but my brain is already falling apart and my body feels like it's already broken.

i woke up this morning with all my muscles screaming out in pain. whatever germs are still lurking around in my throat and nose are literally kicking the crap outta me and despite vitamins, a neti pot, and drinking lots of water, i haven't been able to shake this cold :(

i know the main thing that i've been lacking is sleep, but unfortunately being a full-time student does not really facilitate sleep. 24 hrs of class, 20hrs of work, 24–40+ hrs of homework, 6+ hrs of commuting, and 1–4 hrs of church (depending on whether i'm playing keys that sunday) per week does not leave a whole lot of other time for the other basics of eating and sleeping...so many times those get overlooked...

so 2 more days till i can enjoy some extra zzz's, have a bit of breathing room, and collect my brain and body bits before i have to face another week and do it all again. don't get me wrong. i do love learning and being in school, but i'm more than ready for a little break from being sick and having to think about homework...

and on that note, back to the homework mountain...

in need of an umbrella

they say that when it rains it pours, and lately i've been drowning in it all...

for starters, a couple weeks ago my poor canon g7 took a fall for the worse and that hospital bill came out to be almost $200. definitely not cheap.

then came my manual camera...an old pentax spotmatic f, which has been in my family for the last 35 years. i was so excited to be taking photography at school, learning to develop film in the darkroom, and pick up techniques passed down from the days before digital anything was around. little did i know though, that this course and camera would put me back another big chunk of change. due to wear and tear, bad weather conditions, and poor storage, the manual camera also had to be operated on. that bill came out to $120. augh.

so it's been quite an expensive month for me...from the 2 camera repairs to supplies for school, a microwave for the apartment, new internet installation, and all the travel costs associated with 4 out of town weddings this year, it's been pretty brutal...goodbye money :(

sugar rush

for as long as i can remember, i have always had a sweet tooth. from candy to chocolate, ice cream to cake, pie, cookies, and all pastry varieties in between, sugar and i have always had a good and close relationship...until today.

after enjoying a sushi lunch at hearst's cafe, i headed back to work to discover that more, a cupcake eatery in chicago, had made a special delivery to our company (one of the perks of working for the food network magazine), and had sent a good 40 cupcakes in every possible flavor that they could. though i was stuffed to the brim already, i found me and my curious stomach wandering into the conference room to scout out the newly acquired stock, and before i knew it, i had grabbed a plate to partake in the eating festivities. with so many kinds to choose from, i was handed a knife and encouraged to try as many as i could. so off i went and ate the following:
• bacon maple cupcake (what a strange yet great combo!)
• mango jalepeño cupcake (had a nice tang kick to it)
• valronho cupcake (mmm...so decadent)
• bacon brittle (quite interesting)

then came the visit to the kitchen where i discovered a tin full of gigantic cookies (thick as a scone and bigger than the palm of my hand). again, the temptation was too much to bare, and on it went onto my plate. in all fairness, i should have stopped while i was ahead, but i pushed my limits, and consumed way more than was necessary...ultimately leading up to the biggest stomach ache and sugar headache that i've ever experienced :(

it's a miracle that i lasted until the end of the day. there were definite moments of immense nausea, feeling faint, my teeth aching, and stomach churning. though i still do love my sugar, i know my body's limits and hope not to cross my sugar quota line again (or at least anytime soon)...

mission: de-bug

as i sat at the kitchen table tonight, i suddenly saw something moving out of the corner of my eye and discovered a dragonfly had made its way into our apartment. i am terrified of most bugs (pretty much everything minus fruit flies), and upon seeing the length of this bug's body, thick legs, and wing span, i was pretty freaked out. i quickly alerted my roomie, doris, about the situation at hand and we banded together to brainstorm strategies to get our unwelcome guest to leave.

after re-opening the patio door to the balcony and patiently waiting for the pest to leave voluntarily, it became clear that we would need to try new tactics. what we ended up with was a swiffer broom, a chair for added height, and a can of scrubbing bubbles. it was quite the team effort as i sprayed the bug to debilitate it and then doris finished it off with the swiffer. though i did feel bad for the bug (what a way to go), it was also such a relief to not have a giant-sized bug around anymore. mission completed.

on a side note, mosquitoes have been feasting on my blood over the last couple of days. my count now stands at 5, with 1 twice the size of a quarter and man, do they itch! though i do love the summer, i have to say that i hate mosquitoes and wish they'd just leave me alone. perhaps it's karma from the dragonfly mission. argh.

starstruck, snail rides, and wedding #1

last tuesday i was invited to go to the film screening of chris kattan's newest mini-series called "bollywood hero", and at the screening, i ran into none other than EDWARD NORTON!!! i'm not usually one to gush about hollywood stars, after all, they are just people, but edward norton is one of my absolute favorite actors...

it was quite the realization. i had just walked out of the bathroom when i saw some guy looking at me and i thought, "wow, that guy's pretty cute and he looks kinda familiar...where have i seen him before?" as i turned away...and then it suddenly came upon me who that cute guy was, so i looked back to verify my thoughts and there he was looking back at me, so i sheepishly smiled and then disappeared into the theater while internally screaming "OMG!!!" :P

so in case you weren't already aware, buses are snails, and the one that i got to ride from nyc to toronto was filled with some seriously annoying people...for starters, there were 2 kids that only knew how to scream, there was a dude sitting behind me that refused to put his phone on vibrate even though it rang 3 times every 5 mins (and i know because i started counting), a lady who sat across from me who probably spent 1/2 of the time on the bus chatting loudly on her cell phone while intermittently hissing like a snake when she was laughing (both highly irritating to listen to), and then a super creepy guy who started making flirty comments followed by racist comments when i chose not to respond. then there was extreme discomfort that comes along with minimal space to move, butt-numbing from 12 hrs of straight sitting (minus 3 short rest stops), and trying to go to the bathroom without falling over from all the stop-and-go motion of being in a moving vehicle. ahhh....the joys of going greyhound...on a brighter note, i did save about $300 from taking the bus vs. flying, but i must say that it was a very painful experience that i hope to not have to repeat again for a long time...

and finally, my first wedding of 2009...karen + dan! though there were definitely some stressful and exhausting moments of the weekend (aka. practicing all the worship songs and special music for the first time the night before the wedding right after my bus arrived, until the wee hours of the night before waking up the next morning to get there for soundcheck at the church), all the music turned out just fine, karen and dan were absolutely stunning and super cute on their big day, and it all went very well. next up will be steph + jer in 2 weeks followed by a week of rest and relaxation back home before i hand my life back over to school in sept.

i <3 nerds

after much frustration and failure in trying to book myself a genius bar appointment to get my sick mac looked at, i stumbled upon a new feature that apple is now offering where you can have an apple care expert call you at your own convenience!!! after spending countless hours waiting to speak to various agents over piddly questions regarding airline tickets, credit card statements, and all other everyday issues, i was pleasantly surprised to discover this great new service and promptly signed up for my expert call.

and just after the clock struck 8, my phone rung and on the line was sean from texas, my nerd hero of the day! unlike most agents that i've spoken to in the past who clearly loathe their jobs and are only there for their paychecks, sean was patient, knowledgeable, informative, analytical, and a people-person. if only all customer service people could be that friendly and helpful, that would really be something...

so we ran some diagnostics, did a safe re-boot (shutdown, turn on the power key then hold shift till the apple and spinning wheel appear), and then assessed some other areas that needed to be looked at. i also asked many questions about general mac maintenance, operating systems, and troubleshooting, to which sean answered all questions with intelligence and care. guess you could say that by the end of the call, i had a bit of a nerd crush on the guy...but what's not to like about a smart dude who knows macs inside out and has a cute accent? exactly :)

midsummer night's reflections

so it's been a while since i last wrote and much has happened in the span of time that's elapsed...

SUMMER BIRTHDAYS...i have never known so many people born in the summer before this year, so it was awesome being able to celebrate my birthday and so many of my friend's birthdays during my favorite season of the year! it's funny to think, but even though i've now lived collectively in nyc for almost 3 years at this point (33 months to be exact), i've never been in nyc during my birthday in the past, so this was my first nyc birthday. though at points it was stressful to figure out locations for celebrating, i was happy with the outcome and enjoyed a lovely french meal at aoc with my crew and some ping pong and live jazz music at fat cat afterwards. it was also great to be able to celebrate back-to-back birthdays with jessica as she was born the day before me. :)

CONEY ISLAND...the last time i went before this year was when i was probably 8 or 9 when i first came to visit nyc. i came at the beginning of the month to catch the ringling bros circus/nathan's hot dogs for victor's birthday and then later on in the month for the siren music festival with terry-anne. though it was quite the trek to get there (i spent almost 2 hrs getting from my apartment to coney island, riding from one end of the subway line all the way to the other end), i loved the excitement of being there, watching the rides (and daring to go on one ride where i screamed multiple times and had my eyes closed for about 80% of it), feeling the sand in between my toes, and enjoying the sites and sounds of the beach, the bands, and everything close by.

BASTILLE DAY...yeji + jacob threw a french-themed party in celebration of bastille day and thanks to the genius of my roomie, sheila, i was able to pull off a french-inspired outfit complete with a striped tee, pedal pushers, ballet flats, a low side-part bun, a cute yellow purse, and a red scarf tied round my neck. i ate like a queen that night (hats off to y+j for being amazing chefs) and laughed like crazy over some of the funniest stories i've ever heard before.

FULL HOUSE...sheila's bro came to visit from wales and brought along 6 of his friends (3 boys and 3 girls), who stayed at our place for 2 nights. it was fun meeting them lot, learning more british vocabulary (crisps=chips, kutch=hug, dummy=pacifier), and hearing them speak with their british accents.

HARRY POTTER...and the half-blood prince finally came out after much anticipation, and i was among the first in the country to see it as we lined up at 9:15PM to stake our spot to pick the best seats in the ziegfeld to see beloved harry potter and the gang for the midnight showing on opening night. highlights of the night include seeing various people in costume standing in a line that wrapped all the way down our block round the corner and down another block, sitting in a sold-out theatre with 1200 other ppl (it felt like being in a giant living room amongst extended family), and making friends with some strangers sitting in front of our crew who we ended up playing card games with on the sidewalk as we waited for the movie to start.

COOKING...i don't usually have much time to cook or experiment much, but as the summer winds to an end, i've found myself wanting to cook more and have recently made brei, tuna casserole, and breaded tilapia fillets.

MUSEUMS...since the onset of summer, i've been fortunate enough to be able to visit:
• the museum of art + design
• the guggenheim
• cooper-hewitt museum
• the met
• the moma

FREE...living on a student budget is certainly not always an easy thing to do while living in nyc, but thanks to sponsored events and generous gifts from friends, i was able to see the plays, "sweet storm" and "hamlet", the ny philharmonic @ central park, various bands at the siren music festival, artists and their studios during atlantic avenue artwalk, and "iron man" at pier 54.

PARKS...i love being outdoors and i'm especially thankful for the various parks in nyc that allow me to find solace amongst the hustle and bustle of the city that never sleeps. many afternoon naps have been taken at central park during my lunch break at work and there's been lots of hanging out at washington square park.

WORK...much like last summer when i juggled multiple hats to work 4 jobs, i found myself splitting my time amongst 3 jobs this year...2 internships (at carnegie hall and the food network magazine) and 1 on-campus position. i have definitely learned a lot and though at times i feel exhausted by the time i'm done my day running around from one place to the next (tuesdays and wednesdays i work half days at school and CH), i know that it is a blessing to have these opportunities to learn and work and it teaches me the importance of time management and hard work.

VISITS...after missing out on seeing bonnie last year, i finally got to see her and hang out again (it's been almost 2 yrs), and it felt like nothing had changed :) i'm also super glad to have been able to hang out with margaret and julie, friends from beantown, and to have sleepovers with bean :)

MOVIES...i don't think i've ever seen more movies either in the theatre or rented over a summer, but to-date the movies i've seen since school let out are:
1) harry potter and the half-blood prince (not my fave of all the hp movies, but still good)
2) up! (one of the cutest movies to date)
3) milton glaser: the documentary (brilliant man and role model, i might add!)
4) ghosts of girlfriends past (def a bit of a let down, though matt's still cute)
5) revolutionary road (incredible movie that left a great impact on my mind)
6) reprise (an indie film from norway that was not much of my cup of tea)
7) eternal sunshine of the spotless mind (quite the unexpected film)
8) confessions of a shopaholic (no offense, but was not very good)
9) the italian job (excellent movie with an excellent soundtrack)
10) the break-up (quite real and though it was sad, there was still some happiness in it)

sick day report

being sick is never fun, but it's especially frustrating when you feel like you're:

1) too tired to leave your apartment (no groceries, renting movies, or running errands)
2) can't do anything requiring too much brainpower (no reading or doing any sort of design/artwork)
3) limited in energy (no cleaning, exercising, or standing at the stove...not that i usually do a lot of that anyways :P)

so what did i end up doing today? besides a lot of sleeping and drinking water/juice, some e-mailing, and the occasional snack/meal, i caught up on uploading pics to facebook (i went from march to may...not bad), took a long shower (the steam really does wonders for your nasal passages), and did a lot of reflecting. i also got 2 phone calls from jess + adri, which brightened my day being trapped at home. it's always nice to hear from a friend just checking in on you to see how things are and to tell you that they miss you. i know i probably don't tell my friends this enough, but i certainly do miss them.

so at the end of the day, though i didn't get to go into work today, i feel like i was still somewhat productive. maybe it's true that sometimes god makes us sick so that we slow down a bit to think about life and what it is that we're doing with it.

late night unslumber

i can't breathe out of my nose or sleep. i hate it when this happens.

felt like absolute crap all day at work while i cycled through drinking hot tea/honey+water, blowing my nose, and peeing (tmi, i know). then came back, bought me some fruits, chicken noodle soup, and a fresh box of puffs tissues with lotion, made said soup and drank an entire pot full, then changed into my pj's so i could climb into bed at the astonishingly early hour of 8pm. a couple e-mails and unexpected phone calls later, the clock struck 9:30pm and i settled into my sheets for a night of super rest that would mend my stuffy nose and roughed up throat. little did i know that i would awake just 2 hours later, unable to fall asleep again, despite multiple efforts at tiring myself out via reading, facebooking, and e-mailing.

some nights you just can't win.

moms + miracles

just got in this morning, which was quite a miracle considering the mix-up that i discovered an hour before my departure with my ticket being reserved and confirmed but yet somehow not issued...not sure about the logic behind that, but since i don't usually fly american airlines, who knows...in any case, i must give mad props to my mama for:

a) donating her hard-earned air miles so that i could fly home this weekend to spend some qt with my fam
b) calling and sorting out the mix-up with the airlines at 7:20AM in the morning in the midst of all the usual morning chaos of getting ready for work, fighting traffic, etc.
c) handling all sorts of stress on a daily basis while she takes care of 2 "kids" at home and 1 "kid" a country away.

i'm sure i am more than a handful at times and most definitely don't say thank you enough, but i am truly thankful to have such a wonderful mom in my life.

from one extreme to another

i woke up this morning feeling like absolute crap. i've probably averaged around 5-6 hours of sleep/night for the last month (which is definitely an improvement from the 4 hrs. i was getting the month before that) and every morning i'm exhausted but every night all i want to do is stay up. this morning though, i think all my non-sleeping finally caught up to me and landed in my throat. though i've downed 3 bottles of oj, a bottle of cranberry juice, and 3 bottles of water during the time i was at work, my throat has gotten progressively worse and it currently feels as though a porcupine is sliding down my throat every time i swallow :(

so i'm in my jammies now at 9PM ready to call it a night...it's either i'm up and about roaming the streets at 3AM eating crepes and staying up till the wee hours or i'm sleeping before the night has even begun. just hoping that my throat will be back to normal asap...

on a brighter note, the presentation went well today at work and i'm glad that i got to spend the day being inspired by many creative ideas and approaches to promoting great music that will be happening at carnegie hall next season.

where did the time go?

is it really april already? i feel like life has been happening at light speeds ever since i got back from christmas break, and this week was particularly more stressful and hectic than all the weeks that preceded it.

it probably didn't help that i averaged around 4-5 hours of sleep a night and worked at the computer until my arms were numb and my eyes felt like they were strained and on fire. ah, the life of a student. it seems silly to think that i volunteer myself to stress, pay boatloads of money, and work myself till i can't stand up anymore...fun times indeed :P

but in all seriousness, though this semester is probably about triple the load of homework that i had last semester and the stress levels seem to climb as the weeks go by, i see improvement in the quality of work being produced, and it truly is inspiring. i love my classmates and together, as a family, we've all grown so much, and come into our own styles. i am so thankful for my brothers and sisters at pratt, because i'd probably have gone insane by this point if it weren't for them.

i know the next month is going to be absolutely crazy with all the various final projects to do and internships to apply for, but it is my hope that despite all the stresses, i will also enjoy everything that school has to offer and learn to find peace and rest. guess we'll see how i do with that assignment...

down to jelly

after a stressful and exhausting night of a whopping 4.5 hours of sleep, it was time to rise and shine before the sun was even up (how i hate having to wake up at 6:15AM. it is pure torture ripping myself out of bed twice a week to make my 8AM class). fast forward to 2 classes later, a buttload of time working my tail off in the lab on numerous assignments, 45 mins of speed walking tonight in addition to the 30 mins. of walking i usually do given my commute back and forth from home to school and back, and no time to nap today. it's no wonder my brain is fried, my legs feel like jelly, and my laying in my bed never felt so good.

go-go-gadget legs

winter. how pretty you are to look at, but treacherous and complicated to walk in.

as i walked 'round my hood running my various errands and picking up groceries today, my legs felt a burn they hadn't felt in a while. it would seem that as i headed back north of the border during x'mas break, my city legs traded themselves in for suburban legs without me even noticing. it's scary how little walking you do when you there's nothing accessible by foot.

so as i transition back into living in the city once more, i eagerly await for my city legs to arrive and hope that till then i can keep up with the pace of life.

on a side note, it's too bad you can't order a pair of inspector gadget legs. those would really come in handy...especially with the monstrous puddles that span across every street corner :P

little ludwig

as i got ready to head downtown this afternoon, the doorbell rung and it was one of my fave former piano students, william, more affectionately known as "little ludwig", who had come for his piano lesson (he now learns from my mom). as per usual, he was as cute as a button and beamed as i opened the door for him and his dad to come in. i couldn't help but smile as he rambled on a mile a second in his cute 6-yr-old voice telling me all about his new toy trains, his x'mas vacation, and school. then he told me that he was planning on making himself a train that would transport passengers from toronto to new york city, and that he would let me ride it for only $1 since i would get a special discount (everyone else would have to pay $100 and more). i told him to save me a spot. what a little sweetie pie! :)

progress report

i met up with a friend tonight at good ol' timmie's and caught up on the past couple months of life over a hazelnut cappuccino and dutchie. sometimes you don't realize how much you've been through until you take some time to stand still and look back. truth is, life can change in the blink of an eye, and so much has changed...

i remember being in high school and dreaming of becoming a film composer. i aspired to join the ranks of john williams and howard shore – writing for orchestras and chamber groups...

fast forward to now. though music is still extremely important to me, design is also a part of who i am and want to be. i think setting goals is an important part of growth, but being open-minded is also equally important, for it's often too easy to overlook the bigger picture when you're so focused on a small fraction of it.

if you were to have asked me if i knew i'd be back in school now studying graphic design even a year ago, i would have thought you were crazy. i guess that just goes to show that life is unpredictable, and that's what makes it exciting. that and i think god has an incredible sense of humor sometimes :P

proud to be canadian.

so they did it! team canada clenched their 5th straight gold medal in the world junior hockey championships :)

it was an intense game and there were so many times that i caught myself reacting aloud with cheering and gasping to all the fights, close calls, and of course goals. within the first 38 secs. of the game canada had already scored their first goal, followed by a drought where both teams tried to no avail. then canada picked up some steam once again and the puck found it's way into sweden's net another 4 times making the final score 5-1 for canada.

as the canadians on site in ottawa cheered wildly and waved our flag with pride, i felt a surge of excitement and pride fill me, especially when i heard our national anthem playing in the background. it's amazing how hockey unites our country and i wouldn't have it any other way.

on a side note, i went to tim horton's today and ate my first dutchie of the year. it doesn't get more canadian than that, and man, was it ever mmm good!

responsibility

sometimes it is impossible to understand the weight of situations until you have come face to face with those that have lived through it.

the story of itsaph is just one of the many stories that i heard this morning about living as a refugee. it broke my heart when she told us of how she had to leave everything that she had – her friends, surroundings, possessions, and luxurious lifestyle, to flee for her life. she told us of how hard it was to adapt to a strange country where she knew nobody and had nothing. she also shared of many other refugee stories...stories of suffering...brutality...tragedy...and death. i felt humbled as i listened further about the condition of many refugee camps...the violence...disease...hopelessness...and danger that i had never imagined to be in a place of "refuge". it made me feel guilty for having ever complained that what i had was not enough, for what i have is far more than what many people on the other side of the world have ever had or might ever have in their entire lifetime.

as i thought about what i can do with the resources, skills, experiences, and opportunities i've been given, brooke fraser's song, "albertine" played on repeat in my mind and the following lyrics rest on my heart...

now that i have seen, i am responsible
faith without deeds is dead

blessed to be a blessing. that is what i want to be.

fingers crossed and playing for five

tonight was a night filled with friends, food, hockey, and much canadian pride.

after a scrumptious meal consisting of garlic asiago fries, wings, a feta/goat cheese/pesto burger, apple crumble, and a glass of white sangria (oink oink, i know...), it was off to the bar section of moxie's, where we caught the last bit of the world junior hockey championship semi-finals game: canada vs. russia. it was the end of the 3rd period and the game was tied at 4 a piece with only 2 minutes to go when russia scored a goal. tension filled the room as we all eagerly awaited the final outcome. and just when all hope seemed lost, the impossible happened. with only 5.4 secs left on the clock, canada scored, causing the game to go into overtime. after a fruitless overtime, it became a shoot out. canada scored 2 goals and russia zip. though my heart went out to the russians (especially after seeing the looks on some of their crushed faces), it was a moment of great pride to watch my fellow canadians win the game.

i'm not much of a sports buff most of the time, but there's something amazing cheering for the same team and watching them succeed, especially when it's a team from your province or country. and as the canadian national anthem blared from the tv speakers, it was a proud moment for all the canadians in the room and i couldn't help but smile.

canada plays for their fifth consecutive gold on monday night against sweden and though i can't predict what the final outcome will be, you can bet that i'll be cheering my country on and keeping my fingers crossed...

heigher heights

i took a hiatus from making new year's resolutions last year, so this year i thought long and hard to come up with a practical new list of challenges...

1. BALANCE. family+friends+design+music+school+church+community=happiness
2. START. no more procrastination. start projects within a day of it being assigned.
3. SLEEP. at least 6 hrs/night
4. EAT. pack more lunches*eat a fruit/day*be more health-conscious*cook more
5. CAPTURE. journal|blog|compose|arrange|design|photograph
6. RESPOND. e-mail replies within 48 hrs
7. SERVE. get involved in community projects & join worship team

endings and beginnings

endings are always a little sad, but sometimes in order to start something new, you have to let go of the old.


2008 was a year of many highs and lows. it was filled with memories of laughter and tears, hope and frustration, obstacles and challenges, crossroads of confusion and many other stops in between, including the huge decision to pursue a far-fetched-long-time-buried-thought of studying graphic design and move back to the city that i've missed and love (a bucket list item i can now cross off).

for the greater part of my life, i have always looked forward to a new year because it meant starting all over again, blemish-free from any mistakes made in yesteryear. this year though, i feel that instead of burying my past, i should embrace it because as i grow older, and at times experience more in life than my heart or mind know how to handle, i also grow more assured that everything ultimately happens for a reason. as much as i hate obstacles and pain, i know i am a stronger person after enduring those trials and without all those tears, laughter wouldn't be as precious to me. as tempting as it can be to look back at the past with regret and sorrow, i want to look at my past with hope. i want to appreciate it for what it was and learn all that i can to ensure i am living my life as wisely and fully possible and that those experiences have not been lived in vain.

so to everything that happened in 2008, be it good or bad, i am who i am today because of those events and hope to be even better tomorrow because of it...